Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Am I Enough ....

As I ate breakfast this morning and felt the sun shining through the window and warming my skin, I felt grateful: Grateful to be able to live such a peaceful life. Here it was, 9 a.m. and I was enjoying hot eggs with homemade whole wheat biscuits and an orange directly from Florida. In the quiet of my home, I could choose to sit in the sun light and watch the birds flocking about the freshly filled feeders. The snow, albeit too early in the year for my taste, was stunning; the sun's rays sparkled like the finest diamond on the snowflake covered tree branches. What a sight!
Again, I was filled with gratitude. Not so much for the snow, but for the ability to just sit and enjoy what many only have on the weekends--a peaceful and lazy breakfast.
Does this make me a bad person? Shouldn't I be contributing more profoundly to the world? What gives me the right to just enjoy and not give?
These questions began to bother me and distracted my mind from the beauty all around.
Doesn't it make sense to offer more? Is teaching a handful of yoga classes a week enough? Couldn't I do more? Shouldn't I do more?
My sense of worth faltered a bit as I questioned my lifestyle. I began to picture other people taking on the morning traffic, having a boss to please, and giving their time and energy to accomplish something. While here I sit, feeling the sun and watching the gem-like reflections on the snow.
To be honest every moment is not as bliss-filled, and there are activities that I "have" to do for work and home. But is it enough?
Am I enough?
That's the real question. Am I enough? Do I do enough, offer enough, live enough? What determines who's worthy and who's not?
Eckhart Tolle spent two years of nirvana living is poverty and homeless spending most days sitting on a park bench watching the birds and absorbing nature. Now he's a best selling author and an internationally known spiritual teacher.
Was that wasted time? Millions of his fans would say, "No." From Tolle's books, such as the Power of Now, it seems that he never questioned his worth while sitting on that park bench.
Is it better to be in a situation or job that you dislike or be in an environment doing things that you really enjoy? Sounds like a no-brainer to me: Enjoy life!
But what if you enjoy sitting on the couch and watching TV all day long? The question may be, "Do you enjoy it because it's an escape from reality or because you feel peaceful, thankful, and more connected to the world around you?" If it's an escape from life, then that's not truly enjoying life.
I wonder:
Can the trick to a happy and "worthy" life be to simply do whatever fills you with gratitude and peace at any given moment?
Is that possible? Sounds a bit pollyanna; but consider having lunch with someone that is depressed and miserable. Are you left feeling upbeat or drained? Now imagine sitting across the table from a person filled with gratitude and joy. Notice how his or her happiness can fill a room and bring a smile even to a stranger?
Perhaps this is the greatest gift we can give.
Perhaps our greatest contribution to the world is to be happy and share that happiness with others.
Maybe relishing in the peace offered by the glistening sun on a snow-filled day is exactly and precisely the best place to be.
Love Much,


Today is the first day of the rest of your life!

1 comment:

Marya said...

Beautifully put! I love it! Smiles and Happiness to you!